To Save a Kiss: Physical Intimacy

Lust After the Body:

Let’s try to make this  short and sweet.  Lusting after someone’s body is a sin, even if you don’t actually have sex.  Matthew 5:28, one of my favorite verses says, ” But if a man looks at a woman and wants to sin with her sexually, he has already committed adultery in his heart.”  What is this really saying?  Basically, it means if you look at someone and want to have sex with them, you already have in your heart and in your mind (I say someone instead of “a man” because this verse goes for women, too).  If that be the case, most people have probably lost their mental virginity.  Although this is valuable information, you’re probably wondering, “Lexi, what does this have to do with relationships?”

Well, I’ll tell you. ;}

I don’t want to distract a man by making him lust after my body.  I think most women don’t realize how physical GOD created men to be.  Usually, women are more emotional than physical, so it’s hard for us to imagine being any other way.  As an emotional creature, I desire emotional intimacy with a man, but men desire physical intimacy with a woman.

Now, I don’t know very much about how men think, I’m not pretending to, but I do know about women.  It doesn’t take much for me to desire emotional intimacy with a guy, so I would imagine it is the same way for men and physical intimacy.  It usually only takes one serious conversation with a guy for me to feel emotionally closer to him, and to desire to be even closer; so I would imagine it’s the same for men.  Just one kiss will make him want more.  But what if you’re not willing to give him more?

…

As a woman who doesn’t understand how physical men are, I have no idea what kissing a man will do to his heart and mind.  It might not be that big of a deal to me, because I’m not physically minded, but to him, it is an invitation for lust.  I don’t want to tease a man saying, “Well, I’ll kiss you once, but I won’t have sex with you!”  That’s  giving him a taste of what he can’t have, and kissing him once will probably make him want another one!  Thus, I would rather not kiss him at all, and then he wouldn’t know what he was missing!

Make sense?  Hope so!

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To Save a Kiss…

Reader discretion is advised!

Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you: Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires…

One thing I enjoy doing sometimes is putting verses into my own words to really put them in perspective.  If I were to change this verse from Song of Solomon (a.k.a. Song of Songs) 8:4,  it would sound a little differently:

My dear sisters in Christ, I challenge you not to be impatient and seek love before you are ready.

I think this wording best reflects my reasons for saving my first kiss for marriage, which I will be sharing in this and the next few posts. (I have a few, and I don’t think they will all fit here.)

First of all, before I go on, I would just like to say that if you do not have the same views or beliefs on this subject as I do, I’m not going to judge you for it; and I’m not trying to change your beliefs with this post, it is merely to share my beliefs and the challenge GOD has presented me with (I’ll go into that later as well). ;}

One of my most important reasons can be summed up in one word: lust.  I lust, you lust, girls lust, boys lust, even married couples lust; everyone does if they realize it or not.  To me, lust is wanting something you cannot have; it doesn’t have to be physical contact, it could be anything from a chocolate bar when you’re on a diet to your neighbors wife.  In the next few posts, I’m going to be talking about a few different types of lust that I deal with concerning relationships (I will try to be as understandable as possible):

1. Lust after the body

2. Lust after the heart

3. Waking love too early

We’ll focus on one at a time to lessen confusion and for the sake of space. ;}